Some of you know that I wrote a novel last year. It started out as just a little pet project for fun but I soon found myself eager to get to the computer everyday and would write for hours. I started in April and in September I found out about Randomhouse's teen fiction competition. The deadline was the end of December so I had a goal.
Obviously I finished it in time (just in time), or else I wouldn't be writing this blog. I've been nervous for the past two and a half months... until yesterday when I found out I didn't win.
The thing is, I'm not as disappointed as I thought I'd be. Maybe it's denial... but I don't think so. I have this perseverance that came out of no where and I think this new persistent side of me isn't going to let this small speed bump faze me. It's going to be harder and more expensive to get my book published now but I'm ready. Whatever it takes.
When I go back and read it over I always find myself thinking, 'wait, I wrote that? Really?'
Whenever I watch a video of me acting or singing, I've always got about 50 negative things to say about myself. I constantly critique myself all the time. But not with my writing. It's, like, the one thing I'm actually proud of. Well, that, and my mad driving skills.
So why would I give up on one of my proudest accomplishments? I wrote the story because I was tired of seeing all the 'same old' all the time.
It was a weird experience, writing my first novel, because it wasn't like the story came alive as I wrote the words... It came alive in my head - I'd watch it unravel and write down everything I saw. It really was like the story and all the characters had minds of their own and I was simply an observer. And since that's the case, I can say without being the least bit cocky (because it was a surprise to me as much as anyone) - it's a really great story. I love it. And the writing ain't half bad neither.
So yesterday's speed bump is today's motivation which will lead to tomorrow's victories. I've finally found something I love to do that I'm actually good at. Do you think I'm going to let one little competition get me down??
Keep it real!
1 comment:
Spoken like a true writer! A book is such a living breathing think of character plot and relations, that it cannot be 'wrong' or 'corrected' but merely relayed to a reader. Your passion and devotion to that story makes me so proud! And goo to see you get motivation from a set-back. Though it may not have been right for the comp, it doesn't mean your story isn't a GOOD one worthy of being read/published. Keep up the determination & drive!
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